2026-03-30
Oh, man. I've recently just come out of a particularly difficult and stressful season with work. It was long and arduous, but I'm glad it's over. I've been thinking about how it affected my prayer life. I often times find myself craving the Lord's presence more and more. A year and a half ago, I was somehow content with light Scripture reading once a week, praying once a day, and attending church once a week. While I'm not the most diligent person, it felt like this lifestyle wasn't as fulfilling as time went on. I found myself needing fellowship more than once a week. Plus, whenever I would miss service, I would feel horrible. Not just because of the shame, but because I feel like the Lord was using fellowship to sustain my health. It felt very similar if I went more than a week without going to the gym. Tired, drained, malnourished. I then added weekly Bible study to my schedule, and that made me feel much better. Bible study is a nice pick-me-up in the middle of the week while holding out for church. But now, I feel like the Lord is calling me to taking another one of my afternoons. If that is what He wants, then so be it. I don't feel right if I am out His presence for too long. I also try to pray 3 times a day, with once a day as an absolute necessity. This is what makes me feel connected. Sometimes praying feels hard, especially when you've gone a while without doing it. It feels familiar to a past relationship I had where I would be so busy at work that I wouldn't text my partner until well after I had gotten off and decompressed a little bit. It feels a little shameful, like I should have been more mindful. But prayer is what sustains us. God likes it when we turn to Him with everything. I usually say a short prayer to start my morning, then a prayer at lunch time and another right before bed. Like with Bible study, the lunch time prayer feels like a pick-me-up between the morning and night prayer. But there are times at work where things get so incredibly busy. I take a lot of pride (not the self-righteous kind) in my work and I can let myself get distracted to the point where I forget to pray at lunch. And I definitely feel the toll. I would feel a little more strained throughout the day, a little more tired, a little less invigorated. I'm glad that season is over, but I think I should've put more effort into blocking out more time to talk to God. To tell Him how work is going, how much I love Him, and what I'd like to accomplish with the rest of the day (I got super choked up out of nowhere typing this sentence). I love You, God, and I love you, reader. During this season, I got the chance to witness to a few coworkers that usually don't bring up faith. I got to have a one-on-one serious talk about faith with a coworker who is a close friend of mine. I got to give him some advice about strategies for dealing with lust (might be a future post) from personal experience. I had another encounter with a couple of coworkers talking about sin. It was mostly a quizfest on what and what isn't a sin, which I'm no stranger to. I got to also witness to two more coworkers about how nice the nearby church service is, because they mentioned how they used to go to church but no longer go. They haven't come yet, but I hope the seed is planted. I thank God that He not only gives me opportunities to enter into His labor but the wisdom to recognize when I must and the courage to do so. I'm glad that I can do all these things for Him. Doubly, I think He is teaching me a lesson on His grace. While trying to do things for God, I think my heart tries to deceive me by telling me that I'm doing these things out of my own will and strength, or that I need to do these things to earn God's love and grace. I feel it when God gives me a slap on the wrist. I know that it's only Him that does good works through me, and that it's out of His will and strength, which I'm thankful for. I pray that He keeps me on the path and uses me to carry out His will. What do you think, reader? What has God been telling you about your prayer life? Does He want more of your attention? Does He want to hear more about your day, about what's troubling you? Does He want you to tell Him that you Love him more often? If you don't already, I recommend that you take time out of random bits on your day to say a few quick words of love or gratitude. I feel like a quick 'thank you' or 'I love you' goes a long way.
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